Before my son came into this world, I viewed the idea of school vacation in a completely different way. I looked at it through “me” goggles. I used to do everything and anything I wanted. I’d come and go as I pleased, and the only person I answered to was my husband for a mid day chat. I used to go to Yoga, get facials, spend time with friends, sleep in, stay up late (past 9:00 pm), go on day trips to where ever, go out for lunch/dinner dates with old and new friends, and so much more.
Now my vacations are centered a little man who doesn’t really like to do any of the above with me, accept for visiting friends/play dates. He likes to get up early, play with his toys, watch tv, visit family members (there is nothing wrong with that), go to any kind of kid friendly play center, go to restaurants and eat the same thing (chicken and french fries), etc.
thinking back, I haven’t had a “me” day in… WOW… I really can’t remember how long it’s been since I’ve had an entire day to myself.
Over my Christmas break, Willy and I were so busy for the almost two weeks that we had off together, that I didn’t have a single second to myself. We had a blast visiting friends and seeing family members, that our vacation went by in the “wink of an eye.” I woke up one Monday morning and it was time to go to work. Where did our time go?
But the point is, it’s not about me anymore. It hasn’t been about me for a very long time. And even if it was, I still don’t think that I could be truly happy being by myself, simply by knowing that my son is somewhere else for the day, and then the Jewish guilt would set in. I feel a lot of guilt when I think that way, because vacation time is time that we get to be together; usually just Willy and me. I think I need to retire my “me” goggles and remember that my little man isn’t going to be this small forever, and in the not-so-distant future, I’m sure I’ll be the one chasing him for attention.
I guess it’s all about finding a balance that makes everyone one happy. Right? Right! I’m still learning as I go, but I love this special little guy so much that it makes my “me” time seem selfish and not important anymore. Thanks Willy for just being you. I love you so much.