I just wanted to start off by saying, that “I know.” I know what your going through. I don’t know what your day-to-day is like, but know that my day-to-day is probably similar to yours. I know that you battle your way, just to get through the day sometimes. I know that your day has it’s ups and downs, just like mine, but some days have more ups than downs, and vice versa.
I know that you think about your finances, your family, your child/children’s well being, and so much more just about every day… don’t you? I know that you worry, just like me. And sometimes your worry takes a hold of you and controls your frame of mind and your concentration. Anxiety sucks! I know that some of you think about your child/children’s future and it scares you to death, because not knowing is just as scary as knowing.
I get it.
I get that therapies and appointments are a top priority, but sometimes it feels like it’s just too much and it’s hard to breathe. I get that with each birthday, you secretly hope and wish that your child will show you just a little more “typicality” and less delay. I get it. I get that sometimes it’s okay to just crumble into a ball and cry your eyes out on the bathroom floor, because your life isn’t horrible… it’s just hard. Really, really hard. And, I get the fact that for once, you’d just like to go on your errands or where ever, and just coast through, without having a little person by your side, anxious and upset, because your taking too long.
Yeah… I really, really, really, really, really do get it.
But, I have some news for you. Yes I do. I want you to know that you are not alone. You never are. Because somebody, somewhere, at that exact same moment in time, in this word, is thinking to herself/himself, “how can anyone possibly understand what I’m going through? How could they possibly understand how I am feeling right now?”
I know it’s a very lonely feeling, because I’m right there with you, but as a parent, or a teacher, or a therapist, you have to pull it together sometimes, and just find the one thing that makes you feel truly happy so you can push through the rest of your day. For me, sometimes it’s that glass of wine at the end of my day. I mean, it’s always 5:00 p.m. somewhere, right? And other times it’s getting a pep talk from my husband; who utterly and completely ROCKS at it, and sometimes, it’s just about me and just vegging out in front of the t.v. and leaving my awful day behind me in a “bad t.v.” haze.
And sometimes… I need all three.
But please, please, please know that you are not alone. You really aren’t. If you need to talk to someone on a more regular basis, please seek out the appropriate help (a therapist), because if you loose it or break, even in the slightest, or crack, just a little, your child/children will be the ones to suffer. So, know that I am your biggest fan, your loudest cheerleader, your shoulder to weep on, and your ear to listen to, because I am on your side. I go through a lot of the same things that you do on a day-to-day basis, and just knowing that you are not alone can make all the difference.
It really does.