An R rated blog

Today I have a guest contributor. Her name is Angela and I’ve had the privilege of knowing her and being a part of her life for the past sixteen years. Angela is special. She can “see you” before you can see yourself. Her super power, is the power of words. Besides being a social worker, she is the of mother of two absolutely beautiful children, a wife to an amazing man, a caretaker to an ill family member, and so much more. She’s just like you. She wakes up every morning, puts her pants on one leg at a time, and hopes for the best, daily. She has her good days and her bad days. She a loyal woman. She’s hilarious. She has her own demons to battle. She’s real. She’s just like you.

Angela and I had one of our famous phone conversations last night; quick but great! We are both dealing with A LOT right now, and have very little time for any added bullshit in our lives. We both came to the conclusion that we should both take a step back and say “FUCK the world!” No, not say it. SHOUT IT! SCREAM IT! “FUCK the world!”

That’s right. I said the word FUCK!

She told me, and I quote, “I just need to find my light and I’ll be okay.”

I was intrigued. “What does that mean?” I asked. She proceeded to tell me that, finding her “light” was her “feel good” place. It brings her comfort. It puts her ease. Finding her “light” was essential for her, and of course I wanted to help. She told me that “finding her light wouldn’t happen overnight, and that it’ll some time,” but she will find it. I know she will.

When you think about everything that’s going on in your life right now, most of the time you think about the negative. The positive is easy to forget because the negative seems to outweigh everything. The negative weights you down. It holds you back. The negative makes it easy to sink lower and lower, until you feel like you’ve hit rock bottom and have nowhere to go. It usually takes someone else to make you remember the positive. It takes that person to remind you of the good things that are happening in your life, and at times, it makes the negative seem almost silly.

Another friend told me yesterday, that, there’s always someone out there that is worse off than you. I have to agree with her on that one, because it’s true. There is always someone worse off than you. And worse off than that person, followed by someone else. It’s a vicious circle if you ask me, but since you didn’t, let’s move on.

Angela helped me find my “light” when Willy he was in the hospital. And so did my fabulous friend J. My “light” was the power friendship and community. I didn’t recognize that, that was my “light” until much later. My “light” was the power of two women, picking me up, and dusting me off when I needed it the most. Just their mere presence made all the difference in the world to me, and I didn’t recognize it until later.

I consider myself to be a strong woman, but every strong woman has their breaking point too. So you know what? It’s 101% alright to say “FUCK the world” and wave your little white flag when you need to. But please know that you do you have a “light.” We all have a “light.” And sometimes it’s hard to find it… and sometimes it isn’t. We are only human, and staying as intact as we can, is a must.

I’d like to thank Angela one more time for sharing her wisdom with me and being a contributor to “Square Peg in a Round Hole.” She is truly an amazing woman, and I have a feeling that she’ll find her “light” a lot sooner than she thinks. Her ill family member will get better, and her internal struggle will get easier, and her “light” Will shine brighter than the sun

If you’d like to be a contributor, message me and we’ll do this together. TGIF everyone and have a great day

Jill and Angela enjoying Shakespeare in the park

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